15-year-old gets blamed and grounded for 12-year-old cousin's behavior while they were babysitting him: 'He lied that I had friends over'

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Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Jan 17, 2025 12:00 PM EST

He-said-she-said situations with relatives are a recipe for family conflict and ensuing schisms. It's undoubtedly one of the biggest near-unresolvable disagreements you'll ever find yourself in—especially when you're still just a kid, and the adults involved are weighing everyone's input equally even though your younger cousin is a known problem.

Still, when you're the older one and have been left "in charge," you'd think that you'd get the first word in, especially when your younger cousin has a known tendency to lie and exaggerate details for their own benefit.

Setting boundaries is never a bad thing; it's just a shame that the adults in this situation aren't viewing it as such and instead are treating this teen like they're simply being insubordinate in their refusal to continue to help their aunt out with the caring of their difficult child.
 

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    Cheezburger Image 10456092160
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

  • After dealing with something like this with your younger cousin, it's pretty understandable that you'd never want to be alone with them again, let alone left to be responsible for them.

    However, this teen was forced to turn to this online community to appeal to outsiders and see if they were in the wrong for refusing to watch their younger cousin any longer after their parents grounded them for their refusal. See the story the teen shared below, followed by reactions and responses from the community.

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    Cheezburger Image 10456091904
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+
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    "AITA For refusing to babysit my cousin and calling him a lying brat, even though it lets my aunt work extra and helps her family?"

    My (15 y.o.) Aunt Cassandra (48 y.o.) has a son named Tristan (12 y.o.) who is a nightmare to be around. Mom started asking me to babysit him so Aunt Cassandra could pick up some extra work. Tristan lies to Aunt Cassandra about me because he knows that she'll buy him a present to "make it up to him."
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    I was babysitting him on Friday and he had a screaming fit because I refused to give him his phone until he did his homework (Cassandra's instructions.) Because he lied that I had friends over and destroyed the house the last time, I recorded everything to prove my innocence.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    I showed it to Aunt Cassandra and she still blamed me saying Tristan doesn't like being recorded and that's the only reason he was acting out! I have told Mom numerous times that I don't want to babysit Tristan because he lies and I get punished for it. Mom has basically just made excuses that kids his age are like that and I babysit other kids so this shouldn't be a problem.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
  • 06
    I showed my Mom the video and explained everything that happened on Friday, but she's still saying that Aunt Cassandra needs the help because the money from working extra is a huge help and I can do this for my family because she needs a dependable babysitter.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
  • 07
    We just got into an argument because she asked me to babysit Tristan again this Friday and I told her no because this kid is a lying little brat. I added that maybe refusing to discipline him is the real reason Cassandra can't keep a babysitter on board and she should try babysitting him to see what it's like.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    I'm currently grounded. But this has been going on since summer and my patience is out. AITA? For finally having enough and refusing to babysit Tristan? Even though the extra money Aunt Cassandra brings in really helps her family?
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a hle: (1) I am refusing to babysit Tristan and (2) this could make me the AH because babysitting him lets Aunt Cassandra work extra and be able to provide more for her family.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    Individual_Ad_9213 · 23 hr. ago NTA. Better to be grounded than to babysit a "lying little brat." Your Aunt and your mom are wrong to disregard your concerns; and they're even more wrong to enable his manipulative behaviors. They are doing him no favors.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    every1remaincalm NTA - What the heck are you doing babysitting someone three years younger than you? I was taking care of multiple kids under 5 when I was 12, he can look after his self... "Kids his age are like that"? No the h I they aren't. I wouldn't put up with lying and violent tantrums from kindergartners, let alone from someone who is actually old enough to stand trial for crimes (at least here in Canada).
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    Stay grounded, just don't go back to that house. Do you have a school counselor you can talk to? The adults in your life are being completely unreasonable and I think you need another adult to get involved.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    Substantialgood4102 NTA. Time for your mom to step up and help her sister out. Being grounded is a great time to spend some alone time. Not dealing with an annoying, lying brat and ungrateful, neglectful parent, bonus!!! Mom wants to help your aunt but only if you are doing the labor. If possible and old enough where you are get a part time job or babysit for other people. Does your aunt pay you? Don't fall for the BS of family. Set your boundaries and make them clear.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    Spare_Ad5009 NTA. Cassandra isn't grateful. Your mother is putting Cassandra, her sister, before her own daughter, which is inappropriate. You babysit; you get chastised. Don't babysit.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    DontWasteMyTime2121. The kid is 12, why isn't he being left alone? He shouldn't need a babysitter if his parents did their job of raising him.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    DoneBabysittingTAITA OP. The kid is 12, why isn't he being left alone? He shouldn't need a babysitter if his parents did their job of raising him. Aunt Cassandra says she can't leave Tristan alone because he won't do his homework, eats all the sugar in the house, makes a giant mess, etc. The
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    reason he acts like this is probably because Aunt Cassandra doesn't want to discipline him or force him to be mature.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    naraic- NTA If you don't have authority you aren't a babysitter. Tristan might as well be alone. So if Aunt doesn't give you authority why are you wasting everyone's time being there.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    fluffyfeather80 NTA. Try saying "He doesn't listen to me so I don't feel like I can assure he is safe. Also, he lies and I don't need to be accused of anything so I am concerned about my safety too. He needs a baby sitter he will listen to." At 15, if he says you hit him you could end up being investigated for child ab e. Who knows if he would
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    take the lying that far but do you really want to take a chance? Also, you mentioned being grounded. Have you been grounded since August over this? If so that's really and over the top. Unfortunately for your mom, this is something you are going to always remember and resent her for. She's the AH for not having your back.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    HandBananas Revenge NTA. Some parents refuse to raise their kids to be well behaved and then act shocked when nobody wants to deal with their Golden Turds.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA
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    kiwimuz NTA. You should definitely not be grounded. You told the truth. The child is not yours so you have no responsibility to look after him.
    via u/DoneBabysittingTAITA

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Babies family dynamics teens family drama stepmother aita AITAH infant kids teenagers blended family siblings stepchild moms family feud parenting family pregnant reddit thread parent raising kids Parenting Fail parents children
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